Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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