So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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