party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Randomize
