She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
