You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
