Me. At least after what I've been through.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
