My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize
