Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
