Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
