I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
