how can u be prego again
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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