She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Randomize