i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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