i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
thus making me awesome and them whores
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
