I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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