Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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