I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
