Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
