you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
