so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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