dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
