ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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