he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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