Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
