Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize