some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
