And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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