The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
