We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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