I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I hate all girls vehemently.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
