babies were throwing up all over the place
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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