Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
