so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
