pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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