Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I just found a bag of teeth...
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
