Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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