Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
God I need to hump something, right now.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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