try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
