Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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