would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
our cab driver is having phone sex.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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