do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
please don't ironically join a cult
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