He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
