whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
