i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize
