Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
