a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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