those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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