make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
