Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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