she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
