Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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